OK, hands up all of you out there who can wax lyrical to other people how they should have faith in themselves, follow their dreams, “Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway” (good old Susan Jeffers)?! Now hands up all of you who think that this advice is meant for everyone but themselves?! Yes, one or two of you out there!
Typical of this syndrome was last night. I’m there telling my friend how she has so much potential but she can often be found talking herself out of trying something new, taking action on a great business idea or not applying for a job because she doesn’t have enough experience or knowledge to be able to do it perfectly from day 1! So I was giving her my full motivational speech about ‘stepping out of the comfort zone’ to get that extra experience; how ‘failing is just a way of finding out a way that doesn’t work’ and how if she told herself that she could cope with her failures she would give herself licence to go for it more! God, I was good…I was on fire….I could already see her at a ceremony for Christchurch ‘Business Woman of the Year’, thanking her dear friend ‘Janet’ for instilling her with the confidence to follow her instincts.
As fast as the image was in my head it immediately evaporates with the realisation that we can give ourselves and others the best advice in the world, but it will never work unless the individual is willing to go “Yes, you’re absolutely right, from this day forward I will live by this excellent set of rules”, and yes, this includes yourself! And why don’t we accept this fantastic advice?….Because it’s too bloody hard….and like most people, we are just not sadistic enough to put ourselves through such constant emotional discomfort!
All that said, think of it like this, even if you can’t live by these rules 24/7, take advantage of those days when you feel that you can conquer, well, not a mountain exactly, but maybe a minor foothill, and do something that pushes your boundaries a little! It doesn’t have to be ALL OR NOTHING, it CAN be something in between!
“Would you like an inspirational speech with your coffee Bob?…….”
totally know what you mean. i’ve stepped out of my comfort zone quite a few times over the last several years and it doesn’t feel good. Especially the latest one I’ve done, ie going into business…my heart is thumping with nerves ALL THE TIME!